Archive | December, 2010

Attention all cashiers!!:

8 Dec

STOP FUCKING HANDING ME MY CHANGE OVER MY BILLS AND RECEIPT, YOU FUCKING TWATCOCKS*!!!!!!

Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Port Washington, Lena herself was a simple cashier at Genovese Pharmacy later known as Eckerd Pharmacy, later still known as Duane Reade. Once there she was taught the basics of being a cashier: ring up their crap, tell them the total, bag it then take their money and give them their change and receipt. She may have hated some parts of that job but she didn’t think that the simple cashier work was fucking brain surgery. So today Lena is going to share with EVERYONE how a proper cashier hands back change with a receipt. Watch and learn. It may save your life someday…or maybe not.

*Twatcocks [twaht-koks]

1. Unisex title for someone who is acting like an asshole, but worse.

–noun Slang: Vulgar.

Origin: Lena made it up.

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Subway stair hog assholes! Photos to come.

6 Dec

Next time I see a greedy a-hole hogging the stairway (usually on their cell or smoking a cigarette) I am taking a picture and posting it here. Wait to see the a-hole. Hopefully no one you know.

Actresses with giant guns (arms)!

6 Dec

Some of these ladies might be dainty and manicured but if you piss them off they could pop your head right off your neck.

 

Angela Bassett especially in “What’s Love Got to do With it?” as Tina Turner

Madonna

Kelly Ripa AKA Regis Philbin’s puppeteer

Tara from True Blood AKA Rutina Wesley

Terminator Mom AKA Linda Hamilton

Are They Related?: Celebrity Edition, Witch VS. Vampire

5 Dec

Amber Benson VS. Kristin Bauer

What do you think? They both have that California relaxed look. Though since I said that they are probably from Iowa and Mississippi or something.

 

Here is a more dramatic look for them both. Though Kristin has a bunch on makeup on you can still see the similarities.

Let me know what you guys think. Am I off or did I hit it on the head?

 

 

 

 

The Single Parent Disney Tear Jerker Technique:

5 Dec

Yesterday I realized while watching “The Little Mermaid” (What you got a problem with that?) that Ariel’s mom was deceased. Then two seconds later I realized that many more Disney stories are centered around the child of a single parent. With the missing parent usually dead.

Here are the films I could think of off the top of my head that fit the Single Parent Disney Tear Jerker Technique:

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
Pinocchio-Gepetto isn’t married, so there.
Dumbo
Bambi
Cinderella
The Little Mermaid
Beauty and the Beast
The Lion King
Finding Nemo
Ratatouille

If you think of more than let me know. But it does seem a little odd and very manipulative of Disney doesn’t it?