The Decline of Crayons

5 Jan

A few more nuts ago I bought a fresh set of Crayola crayons for this awesome coloring book I bought at Walgreens.

I was so excited to pour back into an old childhood pastime I loved to deeply back in the day.

Finally I got home and set up a very zen coffee table space with a snack, tea and laid everything out. I took a breath and was ready to go.

I opened the fresh pack of crayons and then sought out the perfect page. After a few minutes I found it. I was ready to begin. I picked out a nice red and began.

After half a second of drawing I was in shock. The crayon was garbage. For I minute I thought it must be me. Or just this one crayon. I switched to a green. No. No. Noooo!

It wasn’t me. The cheap bastards at Crayola have changed the recipe. The best crayons ever are now as shitty as those you get for free at TGIFridays. The new Crayola crayons are waxy and almost greasy. They don’t imprint the color like they used to. 

I remember the old Crayolas from when I was 12 or younger and those colors were BOLD on the paper. Now the colors are almost transparent over the paper. It’s gross.

I’m going to find out what these monsters did to my crayons and I’m going to get answers. There was most likely some kind of cost savings that prompted the change but I don’t care. I want my crayons back!!

Oh and it’s not just me:

This may lead to some answers:

One Response to “The Decline of Crayons”

  1. Theresa Clarkson-Farrell January 5, 2017 at 11:34 am #

    THats horrible – crayola was the great equalizer – everybody could make beautiful pictures with them — though Ed ( the husband ) remembers his mother only being able to buy the 8 pack and he being envious ( oh GREEN with envy) of the kids with the bigger and/or biggest boxes.

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