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Life Lesson: Two way mirror test

9 Jan

If you’re in a dressing/ changing room and you look in the mirror and realize to yourself that someone may be on the other side of that mirror and that is not  ok with you than check this test out:


Department stores sometimes hire people to watch shoppers change in dressing rooms behind two way mirrors to guard against theft.

This test can let you know quickly and easily.

You’re welcome.

Also apologies if I posted about this once before but it’s good to know so it’s good to have a refresher course.

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Day 5: The Cleanse

9 Jan

Let’s be real this is not really a cleanse it’s more of a choice alteration declaration with a side of contemplation and accountability.

I’m will keep calling it a cleanse to trick my mind into making the best of any decisions. If I stop calling it a cleanse I’ll allow myself the opportunity to eat anything. And that will lead me back to the road to 175lbs. 

So I’ll keep counting the days and calling it a cleanse but it’s in reality just a new way to eat. A better choices to feel better way to eat.

Anyhow I was still on it fully today.

I had the following:

  • Fresh OJ
  • Coffee with almond creamer
  • Lots of water w cucumber in it
  • Half a kiwi
  • Bit of Leftover soy soup
  • Bit of other god knows what from the nice fancy rich people vegan place I went to last night
  • A banana
  • Half an advacado
  • I feel like I had some more stuff but honestly I can’t remember for the life of me. Whatever it was it was super healthy and vegitatian

Oh and I’m not going to avoid meat at all costs. Just only going to have it if I REALLY REALLY crave it. I guess honestly maybe only once a month I’ll demand a steak or have shrimp or fish.

I’m back to work tomorrow so I’ll prob need to start packing lunches at least every other day. I’ll try and throw juices in there too to keep the juice aspect on tract as well. Funny for little juice I’ve had on my originally planned juice cleanse.

Part of why I veered away from only juice is knowing I like to stick to extremes to temporarily and if I go to one and end it I will progress toward the opposite spectrum soon after. Best to keep balance than yo yo.

I’m typing this while laying in bed and now I realize I have to get up and pack a lunch when I’m done bc I have other new routines in the AM that don’t allow time to make lunch. UGH!

The new routines started today! Working out!!! Finally!! 

I stretch for about 10-20 mins than lots of leg lifts and micro sit-ups then end with arm weights. The whole thing is about 45 mins.

I plan to just do a 10 min stretch in the AM. Then after work do elliptical or treadmill for 30. Then offer light supper at home do the 45 minute routine I said above.

That should do it. I also have a few cool tapes if I get bored of my own routine.

So today’s end of day weight is 170.0lbs

Ok so that’s my update.

Cheers

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Dr. Floyd.

7 Jan

Max had a popcorn kernel stuck in one of his recently removed wisdom tooth holes.

He couldn’t get it out on his own and called the dentist to make an appt for tomorrow. He asked if I could take a look in the mean time.

I went straight into Dr. Lena mode.

I got all the necessary equipment out.

The tooth mirror thing, the flat hooked tooth pick metal thing, tweezers, a light and a syringe with no needle to try and plow that kernel out using water jetted right on it.

Then I sterilized the working station, myself and the equipment.

It was time to begin. I tried to jet water into the gun cavity but I couldn’t reach it. So I say Max down and tried the flat hooked tooth pick metal thing. That worked very well and after a few minutes it dislodged. I had him rinse and mission complete. No need for a $100 dentist appt.

He later wrote me a yelp review and sent it via text: (Slight edit made for context.)

” Yelp review for Dr. Floyd’s. 

She got the job done in a calm and careful manor. She was very reassuring and confident. She had the tools needed for the job. Although she didn’t wear a mask. All in all, I would return. I think she works a lot on kids as she was in a hedgehog onesie the entire time.”

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Day 3: The Cleanse

7 Jan

My sister came to visit for the weekend and I was worried that would put me at risk of eating like an animal again. Then I rembered she eats like a bird on a diet so I was fine. (No offense, Kile.) 

We went to a great Thai place down the street and I had a salad with very very light peanut sauce and some edamame. So I was doing great. Except the half a cannof Diet Coke. Ugh. It’s just soooo hard to give up everything all at once. But it wasn’t a full can so I still left happyish with myself.

I later had a banana for a midnight snack.

That wasn’t much food for the day but I did wake up around 2:30pm. So I plan to sleep like a normal human tonight and wake up around 11am. This should give me plenty of time to have a wider range of juices and food.

Weight tonight was 169.4lbs

Disappointing but understandable since I have been sleeping terribly the last few days. 

Tomorrow night I expect to be around 168 or less. 

We also walked around Downtown Burbank for a good hour or more. That was fun. My sister was not very impressed with what Downtown Burbank has to offer but she liked the tacos she picked up on the way back.

Oh and she also hated my new Hedghog suit. She said I look ridiculous. I proceeded to tell her ‘thank you for your opinion but you can fuck right off’. 


Tomorrow should be fun. We’re getting massages!! My favorite!

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Day 2: The Cleanse

6 Jan

Let’s just start by saying I’ll go to the end of the earth to help other people but most times I would even lift a finger for myself. Unless it’s something vital or cake related.

But if someone ask for something I’ll usually help but when I set goals or ask myself favors I usually tell myself to fuck off and ask someone who cares.

With that said: I have been on my cleanse all day. But I may have altered it a tiny bit so I can still do it without running out to get a burger.

I got some freeze dried fruits and also some dried mango and advacado. I had the dried mango with spices on it. It was magical. Then the crushed advacado with some salt. Salt and spices are the bendable pieces I altered to the original plan.

When I get back to work Monday I plan to have coffees too just to survive as well. With soy milk.

The things I will not have at all:

  1. Meat
  2. Cheese
  3. Bread
  4. Fried foods
  5. Any junk food
  6. Any candy
  7. Any other sweets or cookies or cakes etc
  8. Ice cream
  9. Dairy of any kind

That’s the main thing.
I MAY steam some veggies but that’s all. No butter or anything else on them.

I venture to say I can last more than 10 days with those limits but we shall see for sure.

My weight at the end of day 2: 170lbs (ugh!!)

My goal weight: 125lbs


Oh and I got the best thing ever today

A Hedgehog Kigurumi suit. It’s adorable. And the most comfortable thing ever. I’m very tempted to wear it to work. Maybe I can get some kind of pajama day thing going on and wear it then.

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Day 1: My Cleanse

5 Jan

I’m on vacation until the 9th of this month so most of my day is spent sleeping. This helps a lot when you’re avoiding food.

Today I had a glass of fresh squeezed OJ, a dozen or so cherries, a peach and a bag of protein chips. That last one technically was against my rules but since this is my cleanse I’ll allow it. Ha. They were super healthy and delicious.

I’ll post weights starting tomorrow on day 2. But I did drop 2.5lbs from last night. So that’s cool.

I also bought a ton of fruit and veg today to make life easier.

Wish me luck!

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The puppet-man of Boardwalk Empire…

20 Apr

Is it me or…

does Michael Stuhlbarg in ‘Boardwalk Empire’ look a hell of a lot like a ventriloquist dummy?

No? You don’t see it. Well how about this: Which of the below is Michael Stuhlbarg?

G F D A B C E

Got you there.

If you said:

F

You were wrong. It’s really:

C

Thanks for playing!!

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These Two People Look Creepily Alike: Celebrity Edition

5 Oct

Shirley Manson vs. Katherine Parkinson

The War of the Gingers

Shirley Manson

vs.

Katherine Parkinson

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A Little Fat Kid Lives in My Belly

14 Sep

Meet the fat little bastard:

I have the hunger demands of a fat little boy with access to a candy shop inside a McDonald’s. Morning noon and night I crave cheeseburgers, chocolates, ice cream with cake (vanilla cake, of course), frosted animal crackers, cheese fries with ketchup, candy floss, funnel cake, hot dog with cheese sauce and cinnamon sticks with sugar dipping sauce. All at once, mind you. I thought that maybe other people might feel this way. Maybe we all crave our favorite foods 24-7, but we only eat what we can take. But let’s be realistic. When I, on occasion, give in the little fatty freaks out and makes me dive even deeper into the deep fried, candy coated rabbit hole. Once he gets a taste I lose all control and he starts pulling the strings. I call him Hauns. Hauns the fat little German kid who lives in my belly and keeps me from loosing those last few pounds. Oh Hauns. Why do you hate me so?
Hauns drawn by McKone

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Some Famous Quart-Asians

7 Sep

“Quart-Asian”™ – Someone who looks a little bit Asian, but is not.

Tom Hanks

David Carradine


Quentin Tarantino 

Can you think of any more?

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