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Are They Related?: Celebrity Edition, Witch VS. Vampire

5 Dec

Amber Benson VS. Kristin Bauer

What do you think? They both have that California relaxed look. Though since I said that they are probably from Iowa and Mississippi or something.

 

Here is a more dramatic look for them both. Though Kristin has a bunch on makeup on you can still see the similarities.

Let me know what you guys think. Am I off or did I hit it on the head?

 

 

 

 

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The math of the TV show wardrobe:

11 Aug

Smart/lazy  producers decide that some shows should have their lead cast in recognizably similar clothing throughout the season. So that each character remains in your head to appear to remain the same throughout time. Their style and tastes never changing. The producers want you to recognize the character immediately and remember their style as well. Now here are a few examples of this interestingness:

A= Sheldon Cooper– Long sleeved solid shirt under a short sleeved printed shirt, unless he’s wearing a jacket over it of course. With dark straight leg pants, either pattered or solid.

B= Howard Wolowitz– Solid turtle neck under buttoned down collared shirt with maybe a sweater vest thrown in for shits and giggles. He has some dramatic colored pants. Like the red ones seen above.

C= Rajesh Koothrappali– Zip down wind breaker or light jacket over a v-neck sweater over a buttoned down collared shirt. He usually has earth tone pants.

D= Leonard Hofstadter– T-shirt under a hooded zip front sweat shirt (always unzipped), under a jacket. He seems to wear jeans of varying colors, dark brown, blues, and dark greens.

E= Penny– She wears whatever flatters her figure in a cute way, unless she is supposed to look homey/slummy and she is in sweats. It is undeniable she has the largest variety of clothing styles among the whole cast.

Other shows do this too. Just check out some images of your favorite shows online. Not every show does it, but many do. Bet you’ll hate me now because you won’t be able to stop noticing it. Sorry. But it had to be shared.

Thieves!!!!!!! (Maybe.)

2 Aug

This is the Dexter title sequence we all know and love…

Now THIS is the tv spot for the next season of Project Runway…

Anyone else see the ripoffness? Well either the Project Runway crew realized they could reinvent Dexter’s titles to suit their show OR they hired the same people to do THEIR tv spot. And if the same people did both things than that is cool but lame. Cool because the gimmick is great and awesome looking and they should enjoy their neat creative idea, and lame because they should be able to do something just as cool but different for a totally different show instead of ripoffing their own work.

I will investigate and let you know if it’s the same people who did both. (When I get around to it.)

UPDATE:

The Dexter titles were created by Digital Kitchen (They also did True BloodNip/Tuck, and Six Feet Under‘s title sequences) and the Project Runway one was done by…undetermined. POO!

The Digital Kitchen website says nothing about the Project Runway spot. Check out their site yourself: http://www.d-kitchen.com/projects

Oh well…I will keep you updated.

The thing about child beauty pageants…

16 Jul

is that they are super fucked up!! These parents are 100x worse than child actor parents. At least the child actor parents don’t sell the kids as adults. I mean who really thinks a kid should look like this? (Other than a pedo, obviously.):

***Scroll over the tiara’s carriage for a hateful yet all too true message. :)***

These poor girls get their teeth bleached (or wear false teeth over their own growing in teeth), wear wigs, bleach, highlight, dye and fry their hair, spray tan, pluck/shave/wax their eyebrows, wear false eyelashes, as well a thick ass layer of whore-like makeup (what?), practice their walk and “talent” sometimes 2 hours a day with their obsessive controlling overbearing mothers who force their dreams into their children’s heads, and eventually these girls learn to become unbearable control freak nightmare children who will very very very unlikely reach the goal of being either Ms. America or taking over Angelina Jolie’s spot in Hollywood after the government finds out Angie adopts the kids so she can milk the life force out of them and stay young and beautiful forever.

*** Scroll over money wasted for more “humor”***

Let’s look at the money aspect:

The training/coach costs about $1000

The makeup costs about $100

The dress costs about $400-$5000

Spray tan, manicure, teeth bleach or fake teeth (aka flippers) costs about $500

Entering a pageant costs about $1000

Travel/hotel probably about $300-$2000

Costing on the low side an average of $3300 for the girl’s first pageant.  Then the high side is about…$9600. Note that the average first timer would likely splurge their first time to insure the best for the child and end up spending like there is no tomorrow. Now how many pageants a year do you think the average girl goes to? Based on what I have heard from a teen pageant contestant back in the day, the average child beauty contestant enters about 10 a year. The heavy hitters go to probably 20-30 a year.

That would mean on average the family would spend about $63000. With the super crazies spending $18,9000. HOLY SHIT!!

The worst part of it all it that it’s just a fucking scam so these pageants can get your money no matter what happens. Think about it. What do you win? You win a $50 crown and maybe if your lucky a cash prize or scholarship worth a few hundred. The teen pageants are more lucrative for the contestants though. But we’re talking kids’ competitions here. The confidence and fun aspect is good and all but I would think that if the parents put that money to horse riding classes or jujitsu classes or even dance classes the girl would end up being much more emotionally and mentally balanced. Plus when she grows up she will likely be the type of personality many of us normal folks wanna choke. Nip it in the bud. (Not in the pedo way.)

And why do the kid’s division pageant judges seem to be mostly older heavy ladies? WTF is up with that? Guess they were the H.S. teasees who grew up and decided if they couldn’t be hotties they could tell little potential future hotties they just aren’t good enough. What a sick sick revenge. Genius!

Not to mention many of their names are like: Aniston, Kaylee, Boston, Keanna, Teeghan, and Sesame. I made that last one up but you get the point, right?

Another thing: Who attends these competitions? Are there huge crowds awaiting the final winner like American Idol? No. It’s mostly just the parents and friends. So what does that say? It says no one cares but you because it’s freaking dumb and a waste of time and cruel to the future development of the girls. That and it is a really long ceremony and it’s a bit boring.

Who else attends CHILD BEAUTY pageants? Let’s think…who would be interented in little girls dressed up competeing to be the cutest among a bunch of young adorable dimple faced girls, where they dance, wear bathing suits and blow kisses into the crowd with a big smile? Hmmmm…? Oh I know…PEDOS!

Time for Another Round of ‘Are They Related?’: Celebrity Edition

14 Jul

Dominique Swain VS. Amanda Bynes

They both have that “nice girl Lolita thoughts” look about them. Same face shape and coloring. Amanda’s nose is bigger and Dominique’s cheekbones stick out more but I say they look very much alike. They both fill a certain niche in Hollywood. Pretty, cute, blonde girl next door who you just might be able to talk into playing doctor. What?! Come on! They both have that slutty glint in their eye. Don’t get me wrong I think their both awesome. Great talents and very successful. But they still have that glimmer that says, “I won’t tell”.

Anyway…

Dominique has been riding the “Lolita” train since 97′ and has continued to pose in photo shoots as the character ever since. I think she’s about 30 and she still wears braids or flashes her undies “accidentally” in most shots. I wanna see Lolita 2: “Barefoot and Pregnant: The Post Nymphet Years”. (Side Note–I had to Google “Nymphet” to verify spelling since I can’t spell to save my life. Gross mistake.)

Now Amanda is a bit less creepy. For one thing she is much younger and seems to have built an empire of herself. She was one of Nickelodeon’s child actor from the mid/late 90’s through the mid/late 00’s. She was on probably about 4 shows on Nick. You know how Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake and all those other kids were created in a Disney factory? Well the next models of child stars were created in the Nickelodeon factory. “All That” (a kids’ version of SNL on Nick), remember that? I do. Damn I miss Left Eye… 😦 (Side Note: TLC, remember them? Well they sang the theme song for “All That”. Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes was one of their three singers. She had the best voice, and she sure knew how to burn a cheating boyfriend/husband’s house down. Sadly…it was her house too at the time. She later died in a car accident.)

Anyway…

I think Dominique and Amanda could play sisters. And it’s creepy how much time has passed and how little either of them has aged. Especially Dominique. I think she’s an alien. Possibly a pod person.

Thoughts?

Please vote for the sake of my hair and your TV’s…What?

15 Jun

Please click on this link and vote for Zach!! He wants to win the show Oprah is giving to a fan and his idea and humor are awesome!!

This is me Lena, not some whacked out spam bot. I’ll prove it: Vote for Zach or I will cut my hair like it was in High School…you Schreiberziniens know what I’m talking about.(Pixie cut gone terribly wrong with too much Herbal Essence hair gel). You don’t wanna see that and I don’t wanna do that…so vote for the sake of your eyes and my hair. Please?

http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=5615&promo_id=1

It’s a bird… It’s a plane… It’s Kelly Ripa’s…

31 Jan

BELLY BUTTON!!!

I feel kinda dirty for doing this post. But it was too funny and odd a subject to ignore. Of course, she is in a billion million times better shape than anyone who will probably read this, but we can all still get a little chuckle over her (should be pixilated over for the sake of children) belly button.  She may be famous, fit and rich…but deep down she’s just another sideshow carny.