Tag Archives: fat

The Weight Wall is Broken

3 Oct

So I will post about a lot of awesome crap I’ve seen and done since last I wrote but this particular post is about weight and the battle to not be a oinker.

January of this year I decided to buy a scale. Why you ask. Because my subconscious was trying to tell me I had gained a lot in the last couple years and didn’t even realize. Maybe if I weighed myself and saw the undeniable numbers I would stop eating junk food 10x a day. So I did. I am a curvy lady thanks to my grandmas, but not heavy. I thought at the time I weighed around 140 maximum. Well…I weighed myself that night and almost had a heart attack. It read 158.0 lbs. I was mortified. In high school I was between 140-125 (thanks to H.S. trials and tribulations my weight fluctuated often.) Action was taken immediately. I decided to start by recording my weight and what I ate in a journal every AM and before bed. This helped me see what made me gain or lose weight. Mysteriously when I ate well I lost weight. Wow, what a scientific breakthrough! This went on for a couple of months and I eventually reached 145ish. Then I decided to tackle the Master Cleanse. It worked great! It was hard as hell to stick to and I was starving all the time but it paid off. I lost another 10 lbs. This was due to the diet and my stomach having had shrunk due to so little eating while on the diet. After the cleanse I found myself eating less during the day. Though every once in a while I would visit a McDonald’s or Domino’s.

Anyway…

I eventually reached (hit) a very steady (hard) 138 lbs. wall. It was impossible to break it for months. I did not workout which makes losing weight take a million times longer, but I still ate pretty well. (Although I was having the occasional McD’s and all.) Side note: I had stopped journaling me food, but did keep doing the weight notes daily.

Again time passed and I needed to do something else to bash that damn 138 pound wall down. So I made an excel file which lets me write my my diet and weight daily. But this was much better than the book journal because I could see every day all at once. I could train myself to realize that I was eating a lot of food daily and if I ate a salad instead of fried chicken and mashed potatoes all the time I might be able to break the wall slowly.

This is a screen capture of the excel of the first 2 days:

Well so far the damn thing works better than any real diet. Because I am not at 133.0, my lowest yet since right after High School.

See that on the first day I gained 2.5 lbs in ONE DAY from eating non stop? But it was yummy. What?

I am posting this for anyone who is interested in breaking that wall. You can do it. Just keep trying. Trying and failing and then trying again is the only way you can do it. Eventually you will find how to do it for yourself.

Good luck and think healthy.

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The thing about child beauty pageants…

16 Jul

is that they are super fucked up!! These parents are 100x worse than child actor parents. At least the child actor parents don’t sell the kids as adults. I mean who really thinks a kid should look like this? (Other than a pedo, obviously.):

***Scroll over the tiara’s carriage for a hateful yet all too true message. :)***

These poor girls get their teeth bleached (or wear false teeth over their own growing in teeth), wear wigs, bleach, highlight, dye and fry their hair, spray tan, pluck/shave/wax their eyebrows, wear false eyelashes, as well a thick ass layer of whore-like makeup (what?), practice their walk and “talent” sometimes 2 hours a day with their obsessive controlling overbearing mothers who force their dreams into their children’s heads, and eventually these girls learn to become unbearable control freak nightmare children who will very very very unlikely reach the goal of being either Ms. America or taking over Angelina Jolie’s spot in Hollywood after the government finds out Angie adopts the kids so she can milk the life force out of them and stay young and beautiful forever.

*** Scroll over money wasted for more “humor”***

Let’s look at the money aspect:

The training/coach costs about $1000

The makeup costs about $100

The dress costs about $400-$5000

Spray tan, manicure, teeth bleach or fake teeth (aka flippers) costs about $500

Entering a pageant costs about $1000

Travel/hotel probably about $300-$2000

Costing on the low side an average of $3300 for the girl’s first pageant.  Then the high side is about…$9600. Note that the average first timer would likely splurge their first time to insure the best for the child and end up spending like there is no tomorrow. Now how many pageants a year do you think the average girl goes to? Based on what I have heard from a teen pageant contestant back in the day, the average child beauty contestant enters about 10 a year. The heavy hitters go to probably 20-30 a year.

That would mean on average the family would spend about $63000. With the super crazies spending $18,9000. HOLY SHIT!!

The worst part of it all it that it’s just a fucking scam so these pageants can get your money no matter what happens. Think about it. What do you win? You win a $50 crown and maybe if your lucky a cash prize or scholarship worth a few hundred. The teen pageants are more lucrative for the contestants though. But we’re talking kids’ competitions here. The confidence and fun aspect is good and all but I would think that if the parents put that money to horse riding classes or jujitsu classes or even dance classes the girl would end up being much more emotionally and mentally balanced. Plus when she grows up she will likely be the type of personality many of us normal folks wanna choke. Nip it in the bud. (Not in the pedo way.)

And why do the kid’s division pageant judges seem to be mostly older heavy ladies? WTF is up with that? Guess they were the H.S. teasees who grew up and decided if they couldn’t be hotties they could tell little potential future hotties they just aren’t good enough. What a sick sick revenge. Genius!

Not to mention many of their names are like: Aniston, Kaylee, Boston, Keanna, Teeghan, and Sesame. I made that last one up but you get the point, right?

Another thing: Who attends these competitions? Are there huge crowds awaiting the final winner like American Idol? No. It’s mostly just the parents and friends. So what does that say? It says no one cares but you because it’s freaking dumb and a waste of time and cruel to the future development of the girls. That and it is a really long ceremony and it’s a bit boring.

Who else attends CHILD BEAUTY pageants? Let’s think…who would be interented in little girls dressed up competeing to be the cutest among a bunch of young adorable dimple faced girls, where they dance, wear bathing suits and blow kisses into the crowd with a big smile? Hmmmm…? Oh I know…PEDOS!

The Cleanse: Day (Failed)

31 Jan

It was going well enough as you could see with my previous posts. But then a series of events gave me the allowance to give up and stuff my hungry face with McDonalds and any form of sugar I could wrap my calorie deprived fingers around. After about 2 weeks of shoveling crappy food down my gullet I’ve decided to stop being a pig and start some sort of diet again. This NEW diet begins tomorrow. Why tomorrow? Well its because today I had a “one for the road” meal at McDonalds. Don’t give me that look.

The diet will consist of fresh juices, fruits, veg, fish and salads. No beef, no bread or snacks, and NO SUGAR.

Anyway… I’m going to keep a record of my weight/diet/ workouts for the day and all that other crap.

Let it begin…(again):

Day 0 (Day before diet): Weigh 152. Ate hummus and baby carrots. Healthy, I know…then I at a LARGE BIG MAC…and 1/2 a cup of strawberry shake to wash it down…oink!

Walked in the Park for 10 minutes once today and been blogging and figuring out the “To Do” list for the week.

I will keep you updated.

Gym memberships we never use.

20 Sep

We all do it. You can’t lie to me. Well you can, but I’m not there so than I guess you really can’t.

Anyway…

At some point in our lives we get memberships or subscribe to things that we honestly never use. My perfectly intact, good as new, dust-ridden membership card (that is sitting at the bottom of some drawer somewhere in space) is for a gym.

About a year ago I passed by a gym with a great deal and since I had just left my old expensive gym I decided to transfer to a new cheap gym, that I would also never really go to.

I did this and have gone about 20 times…IN A YEAR.

I’m not grotesquely overweight. But a few trips a week would do no harm. Why don’t I go? Well only a naturally fit person would ask that question and to them I say, “Don’t talk to me, you with the good genes.”

Us normal people want to keep our rarely used memberships and tell ourselves that we’ll go tomorrow. Because tomorrow is a new day, the day to start going to the gym.

I feel you.

You know what? After all this thinking and writing, I think I’m going to start going again. Get back on the treadmill and get into shape.

Then again…I do have errands and I wanted to watch that movie. NONONONO! I’ll go. I will. I swear. Well…maybe. If I wake up on time. (Note to self: Don’t set alarm.)

Clothing brands that lie about sizes:

2 Sep

If you say “10” but only fit a girl who wears “6”, you’re a lying peice of shit! Telling me I’m fat when I’m just…plump. FUCK YOU!

I can always trust you, handy measuring tape!

I can always trust YOU, handy measuring tape!